John Tribe

Archive for the ‘Humour’ Category

Am I speaking with Mr John Tribe ?

The phone rings you answer it there is a delay of maybe 5 secs and then the first thing the person at the other end of the phone says is .. Am I speaking with followed by your name.  Usually this question is followed by a lenghty sales pitch without the the speaker stopping to draw a breath.

Read the rest of this entry »

Let’s face it many of us can remember the first IBM PC showroom in Victoria Street London back in spring 1983. When being shown the available software by the salesman all appeared to be quite fast on the black screen with green text, until some printing was required. The salesman would say “Of course this is where you go and make a coffee while it prints”. Well 26 years down the road and we all still wait for computers. I particularly like Eddie Izzard’s take on computers updating, which seems to be the new computer event for making a cup of coffee.

Well as I understand it from December 1st 2009, testimonials will be dodgy territory for anyone who sells over the internet. I like, like I hope most people, do not believe everything I read. We all know that WORK, whether hard or easy, is going to be required to achieve ANYTHING. I cannot help but wonder if the scares, being broadcast so far about testimonials showing average, poor and best, will make advertising boring.

Like many of my generation, I didn’t actually believe that the ‘Charles Atlas’ bodybuilding course would make me a man in just 7 days, or that Guiness would be good for me. I expect a testimonial to show an example of best results. I can envisage, if the scares are true, adverts running something like this.

Get yourself into shape with the New Hokikoki 2000XL exercise bike !

In just 14 days, at 5 mins a day, I lost 1stone

Terry Fitfreak Ex Tour de France Competitor

————————————–

10 minutes a day keeps me trim

Melissa Husswiff womans circle keepfit club

———————————

Bike was put together okay, however I couldn’t find the ash tray or a beer bottle holder, and I don’t seem to be losing weight

Idel Sloeb Couch Potato

——————————–

Oh yes and I better keep safe.

• All persons mentioned are entirely fictitious any resemblance to persons living or dead is entirely coincidental
• IT IS MEANT TO BE A JOKE

I first saw this performance over a year ago when it was a you tube featured video. Everytime I see it speaks an excellent message “Anything can be achieved” Enjoy!

Eat your heart out Europe.

A while ago this link was sent to me. As a guitarist I was impressed thought you’d like to see it too.

The guitarist is Hannes Coetzee.

Its quite incredible but if you ask many under the age of 25 about any event which you might have missed, they frequently say”Didn’t you get my email?”

Read the rest of this entry »

A salesman is a man who turns an opportunity into a cheque and more importantly …. Read the rest of this entry »